Self portrait

October 2017

One of my college painting assignments was a self portrait on a HUGE canvas. While I was leaving the art supply store with my new blank canvas, I overheard one of the jabronis at the neighboring cigar outlet comment that "she seems like a bitch." Ok, Ken.

I absolutely hated everything about this project assignment. I was uncomfortable because I hated school, I hated the class, and I hated myself. Having to stare at a giant, poorly drawn picture of my own face was nauseating. But, there was no way to weasel out of this assignment, so I just had to do it. I still have the canvas and hope to repurpose it someday. 

Lately, I have been thinking more about how people see me, and how I would like to be remembered. What will they write in my obituary? What will they say about me at my funeral? What will remain of me, 100 years from now?

It has been a long journey, but I am learning to love and accept myself. I am not very comfortable with pictures or recordings of myself, so pursuing this idea is going outside my comfort zone. The painting of me and Nikki counts as a self portrait, but I would like a portrait that represents this current moment in my life.

Started off with some scribbles. The main difference between this and the original self portrait is the scale. The size of your picture is a statement in itself:

• Big: Look! At! ME!
• Medium: Like looking in the mirror.
• Small: You need to see me up close to truly appreciate me.

The last of which, is the message I want to focus on. It is easier than ever to gloss over other people without ever giving them a chance. But, I love myself and I know I have a lot to offer. You just need to take the time to know me. And isn't that true of everyone? 

Acrylic paper

I Like Turtles

After toning it with transparent colors, I applied a generous layer of gel gloss. I absolutely love the depth it brings to the image. Which reminds me: I would like to try out matte gel for a more frosty translucent surface that slightly blurs the picture below. 

Took this picture while the gel gloss was still drying. I imagine the matte gel would look something like this.

 

> Next update

Ghost Trick tribute

A group artwork from June 2011. I am interested in re-doing this.

Description: Yomiel looking fly as hell, with Sissel at his side. A medley of characters and props appear in the background. The negative space is white, with Yomiel’s shadow cutting into it.

There was a different version which was bathed in blue-green light. It was more stylized. I’m so sad I lost it...

Background characters

• Jeego and Tengo
• Cabanela
• Jowd (I bet I was too afraid to draw his face)
• Lynne
• Missile
• Kamila
• Sissel again
• Ray

Props

• Crane and wrecking ball
• Guns
• Bicycle
• Chicken
• Red flag
• Donuts and bowl
• Car tire
• Fish tank
• Cogs and gears
• Sweet potato on a stick

What would I do differently next time?

• It would be more stylized like in the lost alternate version. (Ooh, how mysterious!)
• Take inspiration from movie posters, especially Bob Peak
• Include more characters. I want to include Beauty, Dandy, and Detective Rindge, to name a few. 

Other thoughts

• It would be cool to draw it in reference to the Ghost World. O m g. An old school VHS vaporwave aesthetic would SLAP. I remember having a headcanon that the story takes place in the 1980s. 
• The vaporwave CRT screen idea excites me, but I would also love a VHS tape box style as well. 
• In the spirit of the original and its lost alternate counterpart, I should make two versions of this artwork. The world of the living represented by the vhs tape box. The ghost world represented by old, blurry CRT graphics.

The art of idea picking

It’s like job hunting or dating in the sense that you very rarely commit to something all the way, and it’s usually after considering a large number of options. What is worth the full commitment? The uncertainty can be an advantage. It can lead to possibilities you never even considered.

The most important things to remember: 

1. Make it fun!
2. References are helpful, but let imagination do most of the work! 

Flowchart

• Start with an idea
• How would I first approach it? Writing (open concept) or drawing (specific concept) first?
• Do I like this idea enough to pursue it?
• How far am I willing to take this idea?

Channel the creative energies into their respective outlets

• Tier 1: I would entertain the thought of this idea
• Write about open concept ideas in notebook
• Doodle on scrap paper
• Tier 2: I would like to spend some time with this idea
• Sketches and drawings go in sketchbook
• Reflective writing that comes after the initial sketches/brainstorming
• Tier 3: I would experiment with this idea
• Digital art experimentation
• Dry mixed media on decent quality bristol
• Small oil paintings on acrylic paper
• Tier 4: I would put this on my wall.
• Dry mixed media on high quality paper
• Digital art - finished artwork
• Gouache goes on acrylic paper or watercolor block
• Small/medium scale oil paintings (~14” or smaller)
• Tier 5: This idea is important to me. I would hang it above my couch.
• Large scale oil paintings: What idea is worthy of using up valuable surface area and materials?

Flower color wheel idea

Just a small experimental gouache painting. I had a fun idea in mind after learning more about the Munsell color system: I'd love to make my own color wheel! 

The ultimate goal is to make a decent sized oil painting (~14") of a flower-themed color wheel similar to the one here. I am still trying to figure out the details, but it's an idea I'm interested in pursuing further.

Blog ideas

 Things I want to add to my blog at some point:

• Received artwork (importing pictures I posted to my Owlfamilies tumblr)
• Artist appreciation posts - talking about artists I admire and writing about my favorite works that they have done
• Photos - I take pictures sometimes.

Breaking down the art process

Breaking down the art process (so I don’t have a breakdown instead)

Make a detailed outline of the process so I can focus on one thing at a time

This is an iterative process, and no two processes look the same. Steps may be repeated, or skipped altogether. Also, this process is very much subject to change.

The most difficult part by far is the foundation. Before the foundation is established, the idea is shrouded in uncertainty. I need something concrete I can work with before I can proceed to the next steps.

What is the best way to eat an elephant? One bite at a time!

1. Declare the idea
1. Provided by commissioner
2. Selected from roster
3. Spontaneous idea
2. Explore
1. Conceptual ideas: Free doodling
2. Abstract ideas: Free writing
3. There are no rules. Draw or write whatever comes to mind. Worry about filtering later.
3. Reflection
1. What do I like about what I drew/wrote?
2. Where do I want to go from here?
4. Thumbnails
1. What am I trying to say?
2. Reduce to abstractions. Simplify as much as possible
5. Research
1. Now that I know what I want to say, how will I say it? 
2. Collect reference material
6. Zero Sketch
1. Laying down the foundational framework. Reduced to simple, abstract shapes that act as placeholders
2. Scan and fine-tune if necessary
3. Print out zero sketch so that it can be drawn over (but the goal is to not need this step)
7. First sketch
1. This is when to start adding the most important details
2. This is very important. Print out again. Have fun adding details.
8. Lineart
1. Start with the thickest line weight first, to get the essential outline. The silhouette should be recognizable from far away.
2. Move on to smaller line weights to add in details
9. Coloring
1. Block in colors
2. Plan and adjust colors
3. The best part: Coloring!!!!
10. Fine-tuning
1. Add details that are easier to include after the image has been flattened to one layer.

Red Shimmer (Trigun)

Red Shimmer (Trigun)

What this idea means to me

• Vash is the Red Shimmer. 

• He is like an elusive mirage in the desert that is sought by many, but caught by none.

• The mysterious man in the red coat is mysterious and unreachable, much like his lofty ideals that the coat symbolizes.

• He is only known through rumors and secondhand information. 

• The actual man is mysterious and elusive. Nobody knows what to look for.

• By the time people realize it was him, he’s already gone.

• This idea was originally meant for my OC Apollow but I feel this could be highly applicable to Trigun as well. Part of why I loved Trigun is because Vash encapsulates so many of my favorite character tropes. 

• Song comes from Akiko Shikata. I believe it is from the Hanakisou soundtrack but I’m not sure which version (it was released for PC, PSP, and PS2)

Brainstorming thoughts

• Imagine that you’re spotting Vash through a spyglass telescope.

• I’m imagining a very blurry picture or impression of Vash. You can only make out a fuzzy red figure in the distance, but none of the details. 

• Unlike my OC version of this idea, Vash would be more prominent since he is the literal red shimmer. He’s still too far away to get a good look, but he would take up more of the frame.

Visual inspiration

• Artist: Andatsea

• Best example: Pink dunes

• Magical and surreal worlds

• Very background/scenery oriented

• Gorgeous color choice

• Dramatic lighting

• Heavy focus on shape and composition

• Trigun OP

• Reflective glow on gun

• Ominous figure approaching viewer

• Glowing sunglasses

• Serious expression; he looks very cool

• Long focal length

• Trigun ED

• Eerie post apocalyptic scenery 

• Strange, massive ruins in the distance

• Blowing winds

Suggested Elements

1. Vash the Stampede!

1. Coat blowing in wind

2. Desert rags

3. Facing forward

4. Glowing sunglasses

5. Heat distortion obscures detail

6. Reflective glow on gun

7. Serious, intense expression

8. Shimmering silhouette

9. Wind-swept figure

10. Vague and fuzzy

2. Setting

1. Endless horizon

2. Deep blue sky

3. Double suns

4. Dust clouds and blowing sands

5. Glittering particles

6. Heat shimmer

7. Heavy boulders

8. Massive ruins far off in the distance

9. Red sky

10. Red sunset

11. Ruins

12. Sharp rocks

13. Stark white desert

14. Triple moons

3. Composition

1. Horizontal orientation

2. Long focal length (i.e. viewing him from very far away)

3. Red and purple hues

 

Hypothetical commissions

Scenario: Your favorite artist is offering to draw you anything you want. What will you request? Something that fits what they’re known for, but also something you’ve always wanted to see. It’s a fun thought exercise. 

Pair artists with the specific ideas you would want them to draw. Plus, you can then draw those ideas using their art as an influence. Or straight up pretend they drew it- let’s be honest, that would be way more fun. Essentially, this is an exercise in borrowing and incorporating other artists’ styles.

How much time would you dedicate to writing about each artist? Really pretend it’s happening; get serious! Also, when picking an idea for the artist to draw, explain why they were assigned that idea. Why would they be a good fit for the idea?

Example: Carnelian

I would ask them to draw my OCs having a Venice wedding. - The idea reminds me of looking at professional anime art on the internet when I was in middle school. I was so amazed at what they could do. The idea also seems like something you'd see in an early 2000s bishoujo VN.

Starting up multiple projects

 Over the weekend I started up multiple projects. Some were spurred by a single image that inspired me, while others are specific ideas I want to carry out. Usually when I think of something I want to do, I think “I’ll get to it eventually” and then never do. But ever since I started a 10 minute timer, I’ve felt like I can visit a lot more ideas now. 

The problem is, do I have to finish everything I start? Should I come up with parameters? One of my favorite mantras is that not everything needs to be a masterpiece. So how will I decide what to continue working on, and what will I call done? The idea is that I can pick up wherever I stopped. 

Maybe I’ll give “active” ideas a week to work on it. If I haven’t touched the project in 7 days, I will end it there, and I can always revisit it in the future. If not, I’ll keep working on it until I’m happy. 

Maybe I’ll make a list. I could label projects with their status, if I intend to continue, and if so, how much further. I need to visit as many ideas as possible before it is too late.

List of drawing ideas

 Old drawing prompt lists

An art idea list I made in 2009. One of the first things I learned to draw from this list was owls, effectively launching my still-ongoing owl obsession.

Animals

1. Cat skeletal structure

2. Cat head and face

3. Cat expressions

4. Lions

5. Tigers

6. Snow leopard

7. Leopard

8. Dog skeletal structure

9. Dog head and face

10. German shepherd

11. Shiba Inu

12. Pug

13. Beagle

14. Chickens

15. Ducks

16. Eagles

17. Geese

18. Hawks

19. Hens

20. Owls

21. Barn owls

22. Snowy owls

23. Horned owls

24. Parrots

25. Peacocks

26. Phoenix

27. Robins

28. Seagulls

29. Swans

30. Turkeys

31. Bears

32. Butterflies

33. Camels

34. Cows

35. Deer

36. Donkeys

37. Ferrets

38. Foxes

39. Frogs

40. Goats

41. Mice

42. Turtles

43. Horses

44. People riding horses

45. Bats

46. Pandas

47. Pigs

48. Polar bears

49. Monkeys

50. Dragons

51. Elephants

52. Octopuses

53. Seahorses

54. Snakes

55. Spiders

56. Rabbits

57. Raccoons

58. Fish

59. Clown fish

60. Gold fish

61. Jellyfish

62. Koi

63. Shark

64. Betta fish

65. Wolves

66. Zebras

Architecture

1. Castle

2. Street

3. Skyscraper

4. House

5. Eiffel tower

6. Sphinx

7. Big Ben

8. City skylines

9. Rooms

10. Cathedral Interior

11. Cathedral Exterior

12. Old European architecture

Objects

1. Airplanes

2. Bamboo

3. Baskets

4. Bicycles

5. Cameras

6. Cars

7. People driving

8. Cassette tapes

9. Celtic patterns

10. Chains

11. Chainsaws

12. Chairs

13. Clocks

14. Pocket watches

15. Crutches

16. Dolls

17. Forests

18. Guns

19. Hats

20. Guitars

21. Piano

22. Violin

23. Katana

24. Lawn mower

25. Monsters

26. Mountains

27. Palm trees

28. Patterns

29. Radios

30. Railroad tracks

31. Scissors

32. Shoes

33. Shovels

34. Stained glass

35. Swords

36. Televisions

37. Trains

38. Trucks

39. Umbrellas

40. Wheelchair

Fresh foods

1. Apples

2. Pears

3. Cherries

4. Grapes

5. Tomatoes

6. Watermelon

7. Strawberries

8. Blueberries

9. Bananas

10. Raspberries or blackberries

11. Pineapples

12. Peaches

13. Pomegranates

14. Carrots

15. Potatoes

16. Corn

17. Wheat

18. Beans

19. Lettuce

20. Pepper

21. Onions

Pretty plants

1. Cactus

2. Daffodil

3. Daisy

4. Geranium

5. Grapes

6. Iris

7. Leaves

8. Lilac

9. Lily

10. Lily of the valley

11. Marigold

12. Palm plant

13. Palm tree

14. Pansy

15. Pumpkin

16. Orchid

17. Rose

18. Spider plant

19. Strawberries

20. Tulip

21. Violet